Lets face it...Bollywood lyricists have gone in-SA-ne!!
It's a song titled 'Tandoori nights'!!! How...I mean how??? First they make dard-e-disco....then dil dance maare...now (as Barney Stenson would put it) the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on the ice cream of nightmarish lyrics that is our Bollywood music industry today!!
And it happens in a movie which is one of the most expected (for all the wrong reasons) this year....the zzzz itself....Karzzzz (jus tires me out everytime i have to type that out!!)
But....BUT....like the aforementioned songs (ded and ddm...if u cant figure out those abbris after ive mentioned these two songs three lines back, get off my blog)...this one turns out to be suprisingly catchy!! And only one man can make this possible: The Gujjuu (what is wid dis guy and his repetitive letters) himself, Mr.Himeshbhai Reshammiya.
I'm a fan. Like probably a coupla lakh people out there. But lately I'd being getting kinda annoyed with the music he'd been churning out. 'Aap ka surroor: The flick' (i know its not called that....but i dunno how many eeee's he put in movie) had wierdarsed (to say the least) music, except for Tanhayee. The Darling song was something I'll use to torture my worst enemy....dheere, 'tadap tadap' ke. And what was up with those two screechers in the Welcome soundtrack??
Frankly....after probably Namaste London and (to some extent) Fool n Final waaaay back last year....Himesh hasnt had a great soundtrack to boast of. But with Karz (no more zzzs, my laptops' in a pretty batterred condition as is without me punching at one letter all the time)...he atleast has three-four good songs to boast of.
Mark my words, this movie is gonna be a hit. Love him or hate him, ur gonna watch his film...either to ridicule it loudly in the theatre or to...well....ridicule it just a little bit less than people around you are doing. Cause the movie isn't gonna be great. In fact...I'll consider myself darned lucky if its on the right side of just about ok.
But I'm gonna watch it. Not for Miss (I-suddenly-look-like-a-great-grandmother-in-my-overly-bright-red-makeup) Matondkar. Not for the newcomer girl whos name I dont know and dont particularly care about. But for two simple reasons: 1. I like the songs. And 2. I wanna see what (box-office astonishing) trick Himeshbhai pulls out of his cap...I'm sorry, I meant brand-new wig...this time!!
Rest assured...people are gonna watch it with me.
I feel sorry for my friends already!!
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Bollywood calling??
Yup...that does it!! It's all done. No one from my college in their right minds is gonna watch a film which i recommend ever again!!
Its not that I have the best track record to boast of. First I drag two of my (highly) unfortunate buds along for Saawariya. The canvas was not the only thing which was blue after that film...if you get my drift!! Then came the Jodhaa-Akbar debacle!! The icing on the cake was Tashan...for which I dragged a bunch of my unsuspecting south Indian collegemates. All they knew bout the film was that it had been produced by the same banner which made DDLJ!!
Then Singh is Kinng. And today, Bachna Ae Haseeno!! Dont get me wrong....i love most of these films!!! I thought Tashan was trash, but as entertaining as an elephant bungee-jumping from the Empire State Building. Singh is Kinng was a modern masterpiece of Singhs, Kings and Katrina...and as a P2 (Pakka Punjabi) I adored it!! Bachna Ae Haseeno had an excellent Ranbir Kapoor, Bipasha, Minisha Lamba, good songs, Bipasha, stunning locales, good humour...did I mention Bipasha??
But of course....the lovers of high-class, snooty-whatitsname, possible Oscar-nominee films that my collegemates are....they hated each and every one of the above films. Well, most of them did...and the bunch that is on my side are too small (bodystructure-wise) to really provide me much protection against the larger (bodystructure-wise) group!
But I shall persevere!! Since time immemorial there has been a man who has dragged along his unsuspecting friends to every Bollywood movie running in the nearest theatre, no matter how awful the film (as long as theres a hot item number, some reference to butter chicken and an assassination or two). [dark knight theme music begins]
This man has been cursed at. This man has been misunderstood. [picks up pace]
For this generation, I am such a man.... [reaches a rousing crescendo]
My time has come. [ends with a dramatic flourish]
And....cut!!!
Its not that I have the best track record to boast of. First I drag two of my (highly) unfortunate buds along for Saawariya. The canvas was not the only thing which was blue after that film...if you get my drift!! Then came the Jodhaa-Akbar debacle!! The icing on the cake was Tashan...for which I dragged a bunch of my unsuspecting south Indian collegemates. All they knew bout the film was that it had been produced by the same banner which made DDLJ!!
Then Singh is Kinng. And today, Bachna Ae Haseeno!! Dont get me wrong....i love most of these films!!! I thought Tashan was trash, but as entertaining as an elephant bungee-jumping from the Empire State Building. Singh is Kinng was a modern masterpiece of Singhs, Kings and Katrina...and as a P2 (Pakka Punjabi) I adored it!! Bachna Ae Haseeno had an excellent Ranbir Kapoor, Bipasha, Minisha Lamba, good songs, Bipasha, stunning locales, good humour...did I mention Bipasha??
But of course....the lovers of high-class, snooty-whatitsname, possible Oscar-nominee films that my collegemates are....they hated each and every one of the above films. Well, most of them did...and the bunch that is on my side are too small (bodystructure-wise) to really provide me much protection against the larger (bodystructure-wise) group!
But I shall persevere!! Since time immemorial there has been a man who has dragged along his unsuspecting friends to every Bollywood movie running in the nearest theatre, no matter how awful the film (as long as theres a hot item number, some reference to butter chicken and an assassination or two). [dark knight theme music begins]
This man has been cursed at. This man has been misunderstood. [picks up pace]
For this generation, I am such a man....
My time has come. [ends with a dramatic flourish]
And....cut!!!
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Welcome to a world without rules...well, almost...
Hello, companions in the blogosphere!! Welcome to my world!! I would like to say that I have started The Shallow Point for the benefit of my fellow human beings. I would also like to say that this blog will provide each and every one of you with deep, meaningful insights into important and crucial issues concerning our world in the 21st century.
However, as much as I would like to say this, it would be a complete and utter lie.
So, to all the people who want to read about important and meaningful stuff like the n-deal, global warming, rainforest depletion, drug peddling and whether Carla Bruni has actually married Sarkozy under a heavy influence of narcotics, I would just like to say sodof..and get your kicks sumwhere else. Actually, hang on a second, all those people who DO want a debate on the Carla Bruni issue can stay.
The title of my blog says it all. I am shallow. I am as shallow as a particularly shallow puddle on a pothole riddled Mumbai street. In fact, I can only be compared to a puddle that is so shallow that a single guppy (a really small fish for those who dont know) would be starved for oxygen within that selfsame puddle. So my viewpoint is going to be the shallowest viewpoint in the history of, well, shallow viewpoints. You get the number of times I'm repeating the word 'shallow' here?
This blog, as I have probably mentioned before, has not been started for anyone's benefit. I have started this cause I'm bored out of my (rather large) skull. So I'm gonna write on whatever crap I have on my mind that day. Do not belive in my promises. If i begin a review on The Dark Knight one day, leave it unfinished and promise to complete it the next day...there's a 99.9% chance that I'll just start off the next day with a 200-word post commenting on the utter awfulness of Katrina Kaif's Christmas Streamer dress in a song from Race (Zara Zara for whoever actually wants to see this dress).
Hopefully I've scared most of you 'serious' bloggers away by now. I'll be back with posts for those who actually care...or I should say, don't....soon. Till then, fellow humans....try being a bit shallow instead of your usual insightful selves....it's addictive!!
Au revoir....
However, as much as I would like to say this, it would be a complete and utter lie.
So, to all the people who want to read about important and meaningful stuff like the n-deal, global warming, rainforest depletion, drug peddling and whether Carla Bruni has actually married Sarkozy under a heavy influence of narcotics, I would just like to say sodof..and get your kicks sumwhere else. Actually, hang on a second, all those people who DO want a debate on the Carla Bruni issue can stay.
The title of my blog says it all. I am shallow. I am as shallow as a particularly shallow puddle on a pothole riddled Mumbai street. In fact, I can only be compared to a puddle that is so shallow that a single guppy (a really small fish for those who dont know) would be starved for oxygen within that selfsame puddle. So my viewpoint is going to be the shallowest viewpoint in the history of, well, shallow viewpoints. You get the number of times I'm repeating the word 'shallow' here?
This blog, as I have probably mentioned before, has not been started for anyone's benefit. I have started this cause I'm bored out of my (rather large) skull. So I'm gonna write on whatever crap I have on my mind that day. Do not belive in my promises. If i begin a review on The Dark Knight one day, leave it unfinished and promise to complete it the next day...there's a 99.9% chance that I'll just start off the next day with a 200-word post commenting on the utter awfulness of Katrina Kaif's Christmas Streamer dress in a song from Race (Zara Zara for whoever actually wants to see this dress).
Hopefully I've scared most of you 'serious' bloggers away by now. I'll be back with posts for those who actually care...or I should say, don't....soon. Till then, fellow humans....try being a bit shallow instead of your usual insightful selves....it's addictive!!
Au revoir....
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